Wait for it

I remember in high school, working at a pizza joint when one of the workers was fired.

For giving away a 32 ounce coke.


Because he said that he made ‘chicken shit’ on the pizza and sandwiches but ‘fucked them in the ass’ over the beverages. Giving away a coke of that size was ’stealing’ and anyone caught stealing would be fired on the spot.


Movie theaters make their profit off the outrageously priced popcorn, drinks and candy. (They probably lose money on the nacho’s due to health claims. BLEECH)

At the pizza, I took to trying to sell as much as I could and the biggest that I could.

Oh, the owner? Yes. Interesting cretin. A fundamentalist something or other. Would always come in and ‘pick up’ pizzas for the various church functions. I’m sure that he was remunerated by the church for what he ‘picked up’.

I was fired from that job. It was my day off. My grandfathers funeral was that day. He called in and said that I had to work because someone called in sick and I was ‘chosen to work’. I said that it was my day off and I had a funeral to go to. He snapped ‘I own your ass and you either work NOW or you’re fired’. I said ‘I quit’. He said the asshole-ish ‘You can’t quit. I fired you!’ Whatever.

But that was my first experience with the concept of ‘loss leaders’.